As a kid, my brother and I would always watch American Gladiators. We loved the competition and the excitement of it. Basically there were 2 sets of competitors — 2 women and 2 men — and they competed against super fit and strong gladiators in a series of crazy athletic events. At the end of the competition, the competitors would compete against each other in an intense obstacle course while the gladiators throw additional obstacles in their way. Oddly enough, this is what I think of when I think of my fertility journey.
Infertility is a constant battle, and oftentimes against a fierce gladiator-like competitor. The competition is all-consuming, and definitely not for the faint-hearted. There are many twists and turns and ups and downs over which you have no control. From the first appointment, you enter a foreign world with many unknowns and often many obstacles. First, there are the meds — from the basic Clomid to the more extreme IVF meds, they all have side effects and make you very hormonal — think major PMS emotions all the time. Second, there are the many doctor’s appointments, transvagingal ultrasounds, and tests. Your body literally becomes a science experiment as the doctors try to figure out what is working and what needs to change to make the treatment work. Third, the treatment doesn’t always work, and there’s nothing you can do about it. You can do everything to prepare your body for pregnancy, but sometimes it just doesn’t work. Finally, even when the treatment does work, it’s really just the beginning of a whole new obstacle course.
As you know, we have had many challenges in our journey. Getting pregnant was easy, but staying pregnant was not. I am pregnant for the 5th time, and I pray all the time that this pregnancy is healthy. Every week is a new obstacle — first the 2ww, then the beta tests, and then a series of ultrasounds — to make sure the Baby W is strong and healthy. This Tuesday, we go for our 9 week scan — our final appointment with our RE — and I am confident that we will get good news. We’ve been here before — our last pregnancy ended at this point due to a chromosomal abnormality — but I feel very differently now. My symptoms are more intense and I feel more pregnant that I have had in the past.
Hoping and praying for more good news, and 31 more weeks of health and happiness.
Baby dust to all!